Predictably, my inbox has quite a few people in it who are trying to help me to banish the self-doubt… AKA, unsolicited advice. Let’s call it “UA” for short.

What’s funny about UA is this:

The person offering it probably has more of the ‘problem” than the person who is being offered the advice. They are trying to heal THEMSELVES, not me.

Self-doubt isn’t going away anytime soon… until a person reaches ENLIGHTENMENT, there will always be trace amounts of self-doubt, second-guessing, double-checking. It’s because we know that we don’t always know. We know that we don’t have all of the answers all the time.

Rest assured that I’m not exactly living in a mental hell - my self-doubt is actually funny to me, I’m very detached from it. Last night’s post in particular was exaggerated… most of what I post on my blog isn’t “advice”, it’s actually just self-talk, like an online journal.

So, I was exaggerating my “self-doubt” to help myself loosen up that old, stuck energy and to laugh at it.

Some of you became quite concerned, thanks guys :0)

The reason I won’t listen to the BGTP is not because I’m afraid that I will hate it so much that I’ll sink into a depression or whatever.

No no no… it’s because I am working very hard to teach myself to have more and more LET-GO. To “go with the flow”. To live life without any concerns. To let the chips fall where they may.

So, the main reason I won’t listen to the BGTP isn’t really about self-doubt at all, it’s just the opposite.. I’m in the process of getting OVER my self-doubt. Since I know the BGTP is awesome, I can record it and move onto other projects without having to go back and listen to it to “make sure it’s ok” and stuff like that. I’m letting it go, and trusting the universe (Ghita) to supply my abundance of proper editing

I’m also letting go of some old “perfectionist” energies, which is awesome. Thanks to that guy the other night who came by to show me some of myself.

I also do this with my blog. When I first started writing a blog, I would always re-read it, to see how it sounded, to correct spelling errors, etc. This was not only time-consuming, but reeked of perfectionism.

Now when I click on “publish post” I log off and move on with my day. A couple of spelling mistakes will probably IRK the hell out of the perfectionists of the world, but I’m no longer trying to accomodate them. I’m breaking free of all that now, and it feels GREAT. Even my newsletters, I write them ONCE and that’s that. It used to take me an entire afternoon to write a newsletter, but now it takes me 20 minutes.

I prefer my stuff to have like an old “black sabbath” basement recording feeling than a perfect, shiny, crisp ‘professional’ quality, which only wastes my time and therefore your time.

Thanks guys.. I am truly loved

Blessings all around,
Steph