I was going through my dusty old newsletter archive when I
found this newsletter from summer 2007.

The ‘reader question’ was sent to me from a Polish
woman…

… From none other than my present-day girlfriend, Greta.

Cool, I had forgotten all about this. It turns out she was a
‘die hard fan’ of ideaGasms, had all our products, etc.
and she sent me this question, which I answered, without
thinking she would actually become my girlfriend two months
later.

In fact, in those days I used to slam ‘Internet dating’
because I felt that it was for geeks and pedophiles. I guess
I tend to be old-fashioned.

Anyway, two months after this newsletter came out, my
girlfriend Ghita and I flew to London for some ideaGasms
Seminars, and Greta had flown in to come STALK… er, ah, I
mean attend the seminars

So today, she lives with Ghita and I… I never thought I
would meet girls online, but it happened… You can read
more about Greta right here -

http://www.ideagasms.net/about-greta/

Sooo… here’s that old newsletter…

***QUESTION FROM A WOMAN***

Stephane,

I am still not sure if being sub-dom (polarity) is needed in
my relationship.

What for in my relationship??

What will I get from being sub every time every day?

I feel it is against the frame: I act in alignment with my
higher self.

How my boyfriend will know better than me what serves my
highest good?

And what if I don’t feel that being sub serves it every
time?

Does that mean I am not feminine?

I would appreciate your thoughts on it as this is so
difficult for me to understand.

Thanks,
Greta

>>>MY COMMENTS:

Polarity (dom/sub dynamics) can only be of value when you
trust your partner’s lead.

Does your male counterpart know you better than you know
yourself?

If that is the case, I suggest that you follow his lead - he
will lead you into higher dimensions.

Mistakes will be made, of course, but as long as he leads
from the Heart you guys are going to have an awesome time
together.

If the trust is NOT there however, then submitting and
following, etc. will be very harmful to you both.

He will lead you into chaos.

My girlfriend follows my lead because she values my life
experience. It is clear to her that I can see her more
clearly than she is able to see herself, most of the time.

Slowly, slowly, she has learned to trust me, and now we make
jokes like, “Steph knows best” and cute couple stuff like
that.

But she follows my lead because she trusts me. I have taught
her about her sexuality, her emotions, spirituality,
ego-death, Chakras, meditation, I have taught her “pickup”
and social dynamics, I have helped her to heal some of her
past, I have taught her many things and she is most eager to
learn more and more.

So, it makes sense for her to follow my lead, because my
lead is worthwhile… I don’t just ‘dominate’ women, I
don’t just bark orders at them; I LISTEN as well as lead.

And, there are situations where we reverse roles, where SHE
LEADS ME.

It’s not just me in control of everything all the time.

There are areas in life in which she is the dominant one,
the teacher, the “boyfriend trainer” if you will.

“Girlfriend training” (Polarity) is NOT for everyone.

It is for guys like me who spent most of their life learning
about the things in life which matter most, and as such, we
have a lot more to offer women than the average ‘wussy’
guy.

A true ‘trainer’ is a man who is Yin/Yang balanced within
himself. Finally, once the balance is there, the man can
return to being Masculine and take the lead in a mature,
balanced, and authentic fashion.

> This is why I joke that The GTP is really just a boyfriend
training program in disguise, because it installs the right
kinds of attitudes and frames needed if a man wants
polarized relationships in which his feminine girlfriend is
HAPPY to follow his lead.

FROM THERE… Once the POLARITY is established,
relationships are able to go up a notch, and this isn’t
something I talk about in newsletters very much.

I am NOT really in the lead anymore…

I know that it can seem that way from the outside, but
EXISTENCE is the one leading our relationship.

It isn’t about me getting what I want and Ghita getting
what she wants anymore, because we have surrendered our
relationship to Existence.

Instead of asking, “What’s in it for us?” we have learned
to ask, “What would be best for EXISTENCE?”

This is the level where the relationship grows beyond two
people, and now serves existence, humanity, the world.

Today, our relationship comes with a greater sense of
responsibility than ever before. We realize that our every
action not only affects us, but it affects the thousands of
people who come to learn from us, and that’s just for
starters. The relationship that we have has become greater
than ourselves, and as such, it has become a great honor and
privilege.

Thanks for your question.

Blessings,
Stephane

PS – AGAIN –> >NOTE: If you want to start getting a
ROCK-SOLID education in how to turn your hit-and-miss
success with women into consistent, repeatable,
HEART-CENTERED success on EVERY LEVEL of the game, go here
and take a look at ALL my programs for yourself right now:
http://www.ideagasms.net/ideagasms-products/